


A dire misstep

by Coffeesheep



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Oral Sex, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Torture, Vomiting, Whipping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 10:21:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14767757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coffeesheep/pseuds/Coffeesheep
Summary: Molly and Beau intrudes on the land of a very sadistic person.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not apologizing for my horrid fantasies. This is not pretty anywhere. It's also the first fic I've ever posted and I have no idea how to tag and shit, so please be gentle with me.

Something held his wrists. His face hurt so bad and he tasted blood through the rag stuffed in his mouth. How had he ended up here? He tried to shake his head to clear his thoughts, but something held his horns, and he felt so dizzy and had a splitting headache. Even so, the memories trickled back.

Him and Beau had been checking out the surroundings around their camp when they were ambushed by a mage and his cohorts. Without the others they hadn't stood a chance. They had tapped out their powers and fallen, one after another.

And then they had woken up in a cell. Manacled and gagged. The mage had entered at some point, holding a whip which he lashed against Beau, who was closest. Molly had thrown himself in front of her and caught the whip in his face. The lash still stung. The mage had laughed, delighted, and demanded that Mollymauk should be made ready for him. Two large orcs had pulled him out of the cell and started to tear his clothes off. When he had roared through his gag and furiously tried to squirm away he had earned a hit to his head that rendered him unconscious.

 

-

Beau watched in horror as the orcs unceremoniously tore Mollymauk’s gaudy clothes off of his body, watched as the heavy club knocked him to the ground, leaving a trail of blood seeping from his neck. That barely stopped the rough undressing, and soon enough all of Molly’s purple skin was uncovered, criss crossed with tattoos and scars, old and new. She had never seen him so helpless as he was now, unconscious and naked on the cold floor. It was so wrong, in so many ways. She was so angry, the rage boiled inside her. She wanted to scream, but the gag only let out a muffled noise.

They lifted him up and threw him face down on a table. Beau shuddered from the sound of his nose breaking against the hard surface. His arms and legs were fastened by straps conveniently placed on the corners. A strap was pulled across his back, his tail pulled back and stuck under it. They tied ropes to his horns and fastened them to to the sides of the table so his head was pulled back. Blood was pouring down his nose and across his cheeks and chin. Beau saw him stir, waking up with a whimper, and desperately wanted him to fall unconscious again when the mage came back holding a whip.

-

He heard the whip crack before he felt the searing pain across his back. He wailed, and almost choked on the gag. Panic began to settle in, its iron cords wrapping themselves around his chest and throat. His breathing was short and fast and felt like fire in his lungs

“Good”, a soft voice said close to his ear. “It seems I have your attention. See, I don’t like being disturbed. You wandered into my territory. So I want to punish you. I was planning to start with your friend, but since you so graciously offered to go first…” Molly felt a hand against his back, fingers almost tenderly tracing his scars. “I’m planning to give you some more of these…” The whip cracked again, and this time it landed on his thighs. The pain brought tears to his eyes, and he suspected his skin had broken. A few more times the whip fell, mostly concentrated on his thighs and buttocks.

Molly was used to pain, hell, he cut himself on a regular basis, but this was something else. This was pain for the fun of it, for the humiliation. And Beau was watching him. He was glad he couldn’t see her face, but he could hear her furious, gagged protests.

The whipping stopped suddenly. The mage sighed contentedly. “Ah, such beauty. Lucky me to get a so pretty guest.” A hand slapped his agonizingly sore buttcheeks. “You’ve got a lovely rear, I must say. Even better when it’s red. I really look forward to explore it further.” A thud when the whip hit the floor and two hands spread him open. _No. No! Not this, please no! Whip me to death, I don’t care, but not this!_ First a wet feeling as a tongue trailed briefly from his sack and played around his hole. Then the mage let out a happy sigh as he forcefully pressed a couple of fingers inside. This was a kind of pain Mollymauk couldn’t handle. He screamed through the gag, from the pain, frustration and humiliation that he felt. The hand pumped mercilessly into him, in and out, in and out, and for each stroke it went a bit further in. He squirmed and tried to get away, but his restrains held him still and his neck ached from being pulled back. He could feel something break, as the mage pushed his hand so far inside him he could swear he was about to pull out his intestines. And then the hand was gone.

The mage came round to stand in front of him. “Now, I really would like to hear you scream, so I’m going to remove the gag, but if you even think of using that devilish tongue of yours, I’ll have my orcs rape your friend.” He pulled the gag off and Molly took a deep ragged breath - and spat in front of his tormentor. “You sick fuck…” The mage slapped him hard in the face, and the pain from his already broken nose made his vision go dark for a moment.  
“Oh, no. I can’t have any of that”, the mage tutted. In the corner of his eye Molly saw a shimmer of metal, and then an excruciating pain as the dagger pierced through his hand and lodged itself in the table. Then he knew no more.

-

This was a nightmare. She watched as the pale mage tortured and violated Mollymauk and could do shit about it. Fuck, she had watched that horrible man plunge the better part of his lower arm into Molly’s ass. She had screamed so her throat ached, and cried her eyes swollen and pulled her chains so hard her wrists bled. The scream from Molly as the mage plunged his dagger through his hand cut through her soul like iced blades, and then abruptly stopped as he passed out. The silence was almost more unbearable.  
“Well, fuck”, the mage mumbled. “Ah well, better put that mouth to use now he can’t bite.” He winked at Beau, as if she was an admiring spectator. _I will kill you I will kill you I will pull your penis off and shove it down your throat!_ He unbuckled his trousers almost lazily and pulled out a rather large, stiff cock. Molly’s mouth hung half open and didn’t resist as the mage slowly pushed himself inside and began to fuck his face. The grunts of pleasure made Beau sick, but she couldn’t look away. Part of her felt Molly wouldn’t want her to see, he would be ashamed, but she needed to be with him, in some way share the torment he put himself through for her. The bastard had taken hold of Mollymauk’s horns and pushed himself into his mouth, faster and faster, moaning with pleasure. After a few moments Molly’s red eyes flickered open, and the panic spread over his face.

He woke with the stench of the man’s unwashed pubic hair in his nose and hardly had time to react as he emptied himself deep in Molly’s throat. His gag reflex set in and he vomited violently as the mage pulled out. His tormentor looked with disgust at the puddle on the floor as he buckled his trousers. “Now, that was just rude. Ferth, Gordek, clean that up, I’m taking a nap.” He pushed the rag back into Molly’s mouth, and untied his horns.

Mollymauk could barely hold his head up on his own, but managed to keep from banging his mangled face on the table. The dizziness almost made him sick again. He must have gotten a concussion. He heard the mage shuffle off as the two large orcs came along and without warning dumped a bucket of ice cold water over him. It was strangely refreshing for a moment, but soon he started freezing, and shivered violently. In the weird, momentary calm that ensued as also the orcs left, he would have time to gather his thoughts. But the only thing that came to him was the thought that he would die here, on this table, broken and humiliated, and then it would be Beau’s turn. _Please, Yasha, Fjord, anyone… Please find us._ The panic in his chest clawed at his throat and his eyes, and forced itself out in shivering sobs.

-

Beauregard had always hated feeling helpless. But she had almost always managed to do something about it, even if it was just running away. Now she couldn’t even do that. She could just watch as her bloodied friend (or companion? Who knew, really…) silently wept, alone, tied to a table. She couldn’t even speak to him. And even if she could, what words of comfort could she offer? She could only cry with him, and hope that this nightmare ended soon, one way or another. It could have been minutes, or hours, but eventually the quiet crying silenced into the more even breathing, interrupted by shivers, of a person asleep from exhaustion.

-

He didn’t know how long he had been sleeping. It was still quiet. He could hear Beau snoring in her cell. He was cold. So desperately cold. He could hardly feel the pain anymore. That was an improvement. A spike of fear went through him as the door opened. A hand slapped his buttocks.

“Aaah, better! I will enjoy you a while longer before I turn to your friend. I usually prefer women, you know, one more hole to use, but you have such a handsome ass. I’m really glad you stumbled into my place!” Smack! Pain. Smack! Smack! Smack! More pain as something that did not feel like a hand slapped his ass. He could hear the rattling of chains as Beau stirred in her cell. She let out a muffled cry to match his own.  
“Nah, you know, I should just use the whip, it leaves such satisfying marks.” Crack, crack, crack, crack, crack. By now, the mess that was his back and thighs was just a whole area of pain. His vision darkened, but before he passed out the whipping stopped. The mage panted and fiddled with clothes. Before he knew it he was on top of Molly and pushed himself into his torn asshole. He started moving slowly, and nuzzled Mollumauk’s neck, like this was some perverted parody of love making, and pressed his body against his victim, squashing his tail uncomfortably between them. He couldn’t help the wave of tears that welled up inside him. They burst out like a flood and he cried and wailed as the rapist picked up his pace and emptied himself inside him.

-

Beau saw the disgusting creature slip off her friend, stretch, dry some blood off his cock and pull his trousers up. “Now, lads”, he said, turning to the guard orcs, “flip him over. It’s only fair he should get some fun as well!” As the guards undid Molly’s restraints he tried to fight them off, but Beau saw it was a feeble attempt - he barely had the strength to hold his head up. She cringed as they roughly dumped him on his back, which was a mess of blood, and his face, which she had not seen since he was taken out of their cell, expressed the raw pain and fear he felt. His face… The sight of it hit her in the stomach like a well aimed punch. The blood from the whiplash and his broken nose had almost dried and covered the better part of his face. His tears had left streaks in the red, turning it into a horrible mask of fear and pain.  
“Hold him tight, boys, it’s so annoying when he twitches like that.” One orc had a fast grip on his arms, the other on his legs, and the mage wrapped his hand around the limp, lavender cock and tutted. “Now, this won’t do at all, I’m afraid. But it can be remedied I wager.” He took his other hand and promptly pushed it in between Mollymauk’s legs and buried it. If the look on Molly’s face hadn’t been horrifying before, it was now. The contorted expression of fear, hatred and pain was mixed with a deep shame and humiliation as his cock began to stiffen. It was heartbreaking to watch. The mage jerked Molly off until he ejaculated, dried his hands off on purple thighs.  
“There you go!” He gave the tiefling’s stomach a slap. “Glad you liked it.”  
Molly wasn’t even trying to hold back his tears anymore, and wept openly.  
“Mm, a man in tears sure turns me on…” The mage started to stroke his own cock. “I’ll just watch you cry for a bit.” And he stood for quite a while, watching the sobbing Mollymauk and flapping his cock until he painted long, white stripes over the colorful chest. “You can tie him up as he were”, he said to the orcs. “And use him as you please.” He left the room as the orcs chuckled and turned Molly back around and tied him up. As one of the orcs climbed the table, released his cock and plunged into his ass, the other one removed the gag long enough to let Mollymauk let out a blood curdling howl, before his mouth was filled with a filthy, greenish cock.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mighty Nein to the rescue

The scream from what unmistakably was Molly was abruptly cut short. Yasha shook the blood from her sword and rushed to the door in the end of the corridor and kicked it open. Nothing could prepare her for the sight that met her. A table. A pair of purple legs stuck out from under a large, half naked orc humping furiously. Another orc holding Mollymauk’s horns and fucking his face. Beauregard was gagged and manacled in a cell on the side, tear streaked face filling with hope as she saw the rest of the Mighty Nein in the doorway. Nott was quickly through and put a crossbow bolt through the neck of the orc that was closest. He slumped down onto Molly as the other one pulled out and reached for his axe. Molly snarled something in infernal to him, which caused him to stumble backwards and gave Yasha an opening to chop his head clear off. That seemed to have expelled the last of Molly’s strength and he passed out. Yasha shoved the corpse off of Molly’s back and was stunned by the gruesome sight. Ragged wounds criss crossed the entire backside of his body, and she couldn’t see a spot of purple for all the blood.

“By all that is holy…”, Fjord muttered as he entered. “Nott, get Beau out. Yasha, Jester, get Molly off that table, we need to get out of here quickly.” Fjord’s words woke Yasha out of her stupor, and she began to cut the ropes as Jester sidled up beside them.

“I can’t do anything!”, she sobbed. “I’m all tapped out. I’m the worst friend ever… Oh, Molly, what did they do to you?” She stroked a lock of hair caked with blood from his face.

“Jester!” Fjord snapped, as he gathered up Molly’s clothes and scimitars which was dumped in a corner of the room. “That will not help him. Just get that bloody knife out so we can leave!” Jester dried her tears and began to pry the knife out of Molly’s hand. The blood  had coagulated around the blade, and as it was pulled away, a crimson stream of fresh blood welled up from the wound. Jester cursed and quickly bound a piece of cloth around the hand. Yasha was thankful that Molly was unconscious as she scooped him up in his arms, it was impossible not to disturb any wounded body parts. As her skin touched his, she shivered.  _ He’s cold. He’s always hot. Why is he cold?  _ By then Nott had managed to free Beau, who staggered to Yasha and reached out a hand to touch Molly’s cheek.

“We have to go!” roared Fjord. “Now! Run!” And they ran. They knew they hadn’t the strength left to eliminate all enemies, but Nott had cleverly locked all the doors they had passed, and set up quick and simple traps to buy them some time. They ran, and just hoped that they weren’t worth being followed. They ran to their camp, quickly gathered their things and threw them on the car and got the horses ready in a hurry. Yasha carefully put Molly down on a bedroll on the cart and covered him with blankets, as Caleb took the reins and the cart bumped violently until they came out to the road. Molly groaned as he was thrown around, and Yasha carefully lay down behind him and wrapped her arms around his chest, to keep him still, and warm. After a while Fjord came and lay on the other side. 

“Oh”, he rumbled, “he’s really cold.” He sighed and crawled under the blankets to share as much as he could of his own body heat. Jester held a sobbing Beau (he didn’t know she even could cry), in the corner of the cart, as Nott kept watch. Miraculously, the day seemed silent and empty. They had deserved a little luck, after all.

 

Fjord woke up with a start, having to hold a screaming Molly by his arms to keep him from hurting himself.

“Molly. Molly! It’s me, Fjord. You are safe now. We’ve got you. They can’t hurt you anymore. I won’t let them.” Mollymauk kicked and wailed, and Yasha held him with one arm, and stroked his hair with the other hand. “Sssh, Molly, my dear. We’re here. No one will hurt you ever again.” Molly opened his eyes and his gaze flickered wildly. He didn’t say anything, but fear plastered his face. Fjord had never seen Molly really frightened before, he realized.

“Molly”, he drawled softly. “Look at me. You know me. You need to breathe now. No one here will hurt you. Except maybe Beau.” Mollymauk took a shuddering breath and rasped: “Beau… Is she ok?”

“She’s fine. Shook up, but fine.” Fjord loosened his grip slightly. “Shall I ask her to come here?” Molly closed his eyes.

“No… Just… Leave me alone.”

“I’m sorry, I cannot do that”, Fjord sighed. “Molly, you are pretty badly hurt. Jester has used up all her magic energy for now, but we are close to a village and we’ll take care of you the best we can.” Molly’s face screwed up.

“No. I’ll be ok.”

“Like hell you will. You’re a bloody mess. We’ll get you cleaned up as soon as we are   someplace warm.” Molly tried to squirm away, but gasped in pain from the slight movement.

“I… I really don’t want anyone to touch me.”

“I’m sorry, Molly”, Fjord sighed miserably, “but we will have to. We’ll be very careful, I promise.”

“Fine… Just Yasha and you, though…” Molly whispered hoarsely.

“Not Beau?”

“ _ Not _ Beau.” He fell back into a shivering sleep.

By then Caleb proclaimed they were coming up on the village. It was still early afternoon and the main street was busy. They quickly found their way into the only inn. Yasha scooped up the unconscious Molly in his blanket and bruskly carried him through the door, followed by Fjord. Beau sauntered after, and the rest saw to the wagon and the horses. Fjord went straight up to the barkeep.

“We need a room, warm water and clean rags. And preferably some strong liquor.” The fat barkeep stared at him.

“This is not a fucking hospital…” he started, but was interrupted by the bag of gold Fjord hoisted up. “Right away.” He put a bottle and a key on the counter. “The room is up the stairs to the right, my daughter will come by with the rest shortly.” He glanced at the battered tiefling in Yasha’s arms and flinched. “Poor sod, what happened to him?” he asked, but Yasha and Fjord was already leaving.

“Everything”, Beau said quietly and walked after.

 

Yasha arranged Mollymauk on the bed, on his side, stuffing a pillow under his cheek, while Fjord interrogated Beau on what had happened. She spoke with a barely contained rage, and Fjord felt the colour drain from his face as he realised the scope of Molly’s assault. A soft knock on the door announced a young woman with a bucket of steaming water, a few towels, and a bundle of linens. As she left Fjord turned to Beau.

“I’m sorry, Beau, but Molly expressed he didn’t want you to be here while we took care of him…” Beau looked slightly hurt.

“Why? What could I see that I haven’t already seen?”

“Nothing, I suppose”, Fjord sighed. “But I figure he’s feeling ashamed, and as you know, in detail, what happened, well…” Beau stomped angrily.

“But I want to help! He’s got nothing to be ashamed of, if it weren’t for him it would be me lying there!”

“I know. I didn’t say it was fair, or even logical. Me and Yasha can take care of this now, and we’ll talk to him later about it, right?” Beau snarled, but stepped out of the room.

“Well”, Yasha mumbled, “let’s get to this.” She took a damp rag and gently washed the blood and other bodily fluids from Molly’s face. His broken nose had stopped bleeding, but was swollen, and the whiplash was burning hot around the edges. Molly half opened his eyes and let out a hiss as she touched it. She continued by carefully peeling off the blanket he was wrapped in, which turned out to be difficult, since it had stuck in his wounds. She asked Fjord to hold Molly while she inch by inch loosened the fabric with warm water. As the lavender skin was bared Mollymauk started to shiver more and more and by the time Yasha had laid his stomach bare he was whimpering.

“Hush now, dear”, she said softly. “We’ll stop there for now, I need to bandage your back before we put a blanket back on. Fjord, do you have the liquor?” Fjord grunted in reply and pulled up the bottle.

“Molly”, he rumbled, “this will sting a bit.” And he poured a fair amount of the liquor over the open wounds. Molly ground his teeth, but between them came a shivering cry of pain. Fjord tenderly padded the bleeding gashes - red stripes disfiguring the colorful tattoos - , while Yasha put together a poultice, a foul smelling mixture of herbs and roots. It seemed to have an effect though; when placed on Molly’s back, his breathing became more regular, though still shivering.

“There”, Fjord said and pulled out a clean blanket and wrapped it around Molly’s torso. “But now, I need you to be really brave for me. We need to set your nose straight. I had it done to myself once, hurt like hell. Nearly crapped my pants.” Molly stared at him. 

“Just do it”, he whispered. Fjord put his hands around the swollen nose and straightened it. The moaning scream from Mollymauk was cut short as he fainted. Fjord sighed and proceeded to redress the hand as Yasha uncovered more of Molly‘s body. As she reached the lower part of his buttocks she swore at the amount of caked and fresh blood pooled up in the blanket. 

“If I get my hands on the bastard that did this, I will tear him apart, from the bottom up”, she growled.

“Get in line”, Fjord mumbled, gingerly wiping of dried semen and blood from a lavender belly. “Let’s get this damn blanket off, it stinks.” As they pulled the blanket off Molly’s tail fell limp down on the mattress. It had been wrapped so tightly around his leg it had left marks.

 

He was wrapped in a painful darkness, filled with a nauseous shame that roiled inside him with oil-like waves. A mean laughter somewhere far away, a soft voice close to his ear whispered he deserved to be violated, used, if he couldn’t defend himself. Another, laughing at his shame. Was it Beauregard? And then hands, hands between his legs, at his crotch, wet, padding and pawing

_ I will kill you! _ he roared in infernal and flailed and kicked, surprised he wasn’t restrained. He heard someone say his name but ignored it. He roared in pain as he used his injured hand to try to heave himself off the table. Or was it a bed? A wave of nausea hit him and vomit splashed on the floor.

“Molly!” Yashas mild voice was close now and a warm, calloused hand pushed him gently back on the bed. His vision cleared. Fjord sat on the floor, holding his head with one hand and a damp cloth in the other.

“Fjord… I’m so sorry…” he rasped. “I was… I thought…” Fjord shushed him with a wave of his hand.

“There’s nothing to apologize for. The fault is entirely mine. We should have waited until you were awake until we went further. I… I thought you’d prefer not being conscious for that.“ He rose and poured a mug of water and held it to Molly’s lips. He drank greedily of the fresh fluid while Yasha cleaned up the floor.

“I suppose you were right, in some way… Oblivion would have been blissful… Tell me, how bad is it?” A short pause, and Yasha answered:

“You seem quite torn, but I haven’t checked thoroughly… I have no experience in such things, and Jester can probably sort it out when she is rested. But you are a bloody mess, literally. We should get you cleaned up, if you’re up for it.” Molly sighed and closed his eyes.

“Fine… Fjord?”

“Yes?” A soft drawl close to his face.

“Would you do me a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Would you… hold my hand, please?” The plea was barely a whisper. A large hand wrapped his uninjured one and squeezed it gently. Yasha continued to clean off the filth between Mollymauk’s legs and treat the wounds on the back of his thighs. She then wrapped him in a mound of blankets.

“There, all done for now. Jester will have to take care of the rest.” She put a hand on his cheek. “You are still cold. You need something to eat too.”

“Yeah… I don’t really feel like eating right now. Could use some more water though.” Fjord refilled the mug, without letting go of Molly’s hand and let him drink.

“There you go”, he mumbled. “But we really need to get you warm. I gather you don’t like the thought of skin to skin contact right now, but that  _ is _ the most effective way I know.”

“Are you offering to sleep with me, Fjord?” A remnant of the old Molly crept into his voice, but was quelled by his shivering. “But you’re right. I don’t really  _ want  _ anyone touching me right now. But I’m freezing like hell”, he whispered through chattering teeth. “So yes, please would you try to warm me up?” Fjord nodded, undressed to his smallclothes and crawled into bed beside Mollymauk, who immediately tensed up as large, green arms was put around him.

“Shh, I’m not going to hurt you. Nothing can harm you here. I will keep you warm, and Yasha will keep watch, ok.” Fjord inched his arm under Molly’s neck and pulled him close. The horns and the broken nose made it slightly awkward, but it worked. The tiefling gradually relaxed and eventually fell to sleep. Fjord absentmindedly patted Molly’s hair, which he realized also were caked with blood. He would have to get a proper bath soon. Yasha quietly gathered the dirty towels in the blanket, picked up the bucket and left.

 

Outside the room Beau waited. She started when Yasha opened the door.

“How is he?” she asked quietly.

“Cleaner. Asleep.”  Yasha dumped the blanket on the floor and pulled Beau up in a hug. “I hate to see him like this.” A quaver Beau never had heard before had worked itself into her voice. “He’s always the one looking after me, not the other way round. I want to make him whole. But I can’t do shit.” Beau stroked the large woman’s back.

“No one can fix him just like that. He’s been through something terrible, and I will have nightmares about it forever I think. But together we can help him come through to the other side, in time. Damn, I wish I could see him.” Yasha put a kiss on top of her head.

“Come. Let’s have a beer and go to bed.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

Fjord couldn’t sleep. He was busy thinking out ways to kill the man responsible for Molly’s torture. It was a pleasant enough way to spend the time while the purple tiefling in his arms slowly got warmer. His tail had wrapped itself tightly around Fjord’s leg, and it was beginning to hurt, but damn him if he was going to wake Mollymauk now. He needed his sleep.

It was still dark outside when Molly stirred. First a desperate, pleading moan escaped his lips, then he started to twitch and try to flail his arms. Fjord held him tightly.

“Ssh, my friend. It’s ok. Everything is going to be fine. You’re safe here.” Fjord rocked him in his arms, and hummed a quiet tune until Molly’s moaning turned into restrained sobs.

“Hey.” Fjord squeezed him gently and pressed a kiss on the top of his head. “It’s ok. Don’t hold it in for me.” And Molly cried. Hulking, desperate sobs interrupted by heartbreaking wails while his uninjured hand clawed at his chest, leaving bleeding scratches. Fjord firmly took his hand and put it on his own chest instead.

“You are bleeding enough already, my dear. Claw at me if you need to. And try to breathe with be, ok. You are hyperventilating.” Molly grasped at his skin, the panic, fear and sorrow flowing through him in waves. It went on for ages, Fjord thought, but eventually the ocean of tears calmed down to a slow stream.

“I feel… disgusting”, Molly whispered. “Dirty.” Fjord stroked his tear streaked cheek.

“You are a bit filthy. But never disgusting. As soon as Jester’s healed you up properly we’ll get you a good soak.”

“It wasn’t what I meant…”

“I know. But what more can I say? I, or anyone else, will never think less of you because of what he did to you.”

“I’m not sure I’m equipped for handling this. I’m used to people looking sideways at me, even hating me, I know how to deal with that. I don’t know how to deal with all this.” Molly started crying again. “And I don’t think I’ve cried this much in my entire life.” Fjord hugged him tighter.

“It’s good to cry, just let it all out. And I think none are equipped to deal with things like this. Not on their own. But you are not alone in this. We all will help you, to the best of our abilities. And whatever you do, don’t close yourself up. You need to talk about it to deal. Also, we will find that bastard and kill him. Try to sleep now. It’s soon morning, and Jester can take a look at you.” Both of them fell asleep a while later.

 

Fjord woke up to a burning hot Molly. Way to hot. Man, he deserved a normal body temperature. Mollymauk moaned and shivered when Fjord untangled his arms and slipped out of the bed. He put on his trousers and went barefoot out in the corridor. It was empty, except - to his surprise - Nott, who was snoring outside the door. He poked her with her foot.

“Wha- ? Oh, Fjord. Is he still alive?”

“Of course he’s still alive, why would you say such a thing?”

“It’s just, he was so beat up, and he’s been crying and screaming all night, and now he’s quiet.” Fjord ruffled her hair.

“He’s alive, however he’s quite ill. Would you mind running to get Jester? I’ll just pop downstairs to get something to eat.” Nott scuttled off and Fjord hurried down to the common room. It was very early, so only one patron (who seemed to have been sitting there all night) were there apart from the innkeeper, who plastered on a smile as the half-orc approached.

“Good morning! What can I get you? How’s your friend doing?”

“To early to tell… I need some breakfast for me. And something light for my friend.”

“Got some soup from yesterday. It’s mostly broth left.”

“That’ll do. I’ll take it up to our room, if you don’t mind.” The innkeeper nodded and loaded a tray with a bowl of steaming soup, bread, butter and cheese and a large mug of coffee. Fjord handed him a few silver and balanced the tray up to their room. 

 

Jester was already there with a hand on Molly’s forehead and a frown on her face. She looked up at him when he entered.

“He’s running a fever.”

“I know. But you can heal him, right?”

“Not the fever. I can heal the wounds, and then hopefully the fever will go down…” Her voice trailed away.

“Get going then”, Fjord said impatiently and bit in the fresh bread. Jester snarled at him.

“Don’t be such a douchebag. I need to decide what’s most pressing. I’m not sure I can manage to heal everything in one go.” Fjord sighed.

“I apologize, Jester. I’m so tired.”

“It’s ok, I love you anyway.”

“He’s got some internal injuries. Anally.” Jester cringed at that. “That’s probably a good way to start. I think the nose and the hand goes next. And then take what you can on his back.” Jester nodded and patted Molly’s cheek.

“Hey, Molly”, she said cheerfully. “I’m going to heal you now, so you’ll feel all better soon.” There was no response more than a mewling sound. “I’m going to touch your butt now.” 

Molly let hear a protesting moan, and he jerked away as Jester lifted the blanket. Fjord heard a sharp intake of air from her and bolted from the chair to come around. There was a large blood stain on the sheets, and a small trickle of blood and a yellowish liquid striped the purple skin.

“Fuck”, he said. “But you can fix this, right?”

“I… think so.” Jester sounded uncertain and slightly frightened. A weak cough came from Molly.

“Do you mind? As much as I appreciate you guys staring at my ass, please get along with it. Feeling a bit exposed here.” Molly’s voice was weak and raspy, but Fjord felt a surge of relief as he heard the real, jovial Molly breaking through for the first time since he came back.

“Sorry, Molly. But you have such a nice ass.” 

The worry shone through Jester’s voice as she laid a hand gently on his hip and a warm light shone through her fingers. She walked around to the other side of the bed and healed his injured hand. Molly flexed his fingers appreciatively. She put her hands around his face and let the healing light seal up the cut from the whip, and a deep sigh of relief escaped Molly’s lips as she mended his broken nose. Jester slumped down on the chair beside the bed.

“Guh, healing is hard work. I need something to eat before I continue.” She pulled a crumbling donut from one of her pockets and swallowed it down with a mouthful of Fjord’s coffee. 

“How are you feeling, Molly?” Fjord reached out a hand and placed it on Mollymauk’s cheek. “You are still burning up.”

“Well, I don’t hurt as much, and I can breathe through my nose. Apart from that, no change. Will you let me sleep now?” Fjord pressed a kiss on his forehead.

“Soon. You should have something to eat first. And Jester should do what she can for your back, so it’ll be easier for you to sit up.” Molly turned his face away.

“I don’t feel like eating.”

“Well, you will eat something. The little that was left in your stomach you threw up on me, remember?”

“Sorry”, Molly mumbled into his pillow. Fjord patted him on one of his horns and told him not to worry about it. Jester swallowed her second donut and proceeded to heal Molly’s back. She managed to seal up almost all the wounds; there were only a few large gashes left on the back of his thighs and across the shoulder blades when she proclaimed she was all spent and needed to get some proper breakfast and left the room.

 

Fjord helped Molly assume a sitting position, wrapped him in a blanket and gave him a mug of water. His hands were shaking so much he sploshed a big part of it over his chest. Fjord gently took the mug from him and held it so he could drink properly. He then reached for the bowl, but Molly put a hand on his arm.

“You are  _ not _ spoon feeding me”, he croaked.

“Would you rather Jester did it? Thought not. You  _ are _ eating something, but you’d have the whole bowl over you before long in this state. So open up, damn proud tiefling.” Molly actually snickered a bit at that.

“I’m not hungry.”

“Well, fuck you. You’ll eat anyway.”

“Yes mother.” Mollymauk actually smiled a crooked smile before he got a spoonful of soup in his mouth.

 

Eating was hard. He managed a few spoonfuls, but it was difficult to swallow. His abused throat still ached, even after Jester’s healing, and the lukewarm, salty liquid trickling down… He felt a wave of nausea go through him, and leaned back against the headrest and closed his eyes.

“Hey, Molly!” A clatter from the bowl and spoon being put aside. A calloused hand on his clammy forehead. “You look pale. Feeling sick?” Molly nodded. “Gonna throw up on me again?” He pressed his lips hard together and shook his head. A couple of tears fell down his cheek. A large finger dried them away.

“You’re shivering. What do you say to a warm bath? Would be good to get that filth out of your hair.”

“I’d have to go out of here. I don’t want anyone to see me”, Molly whispered.

“You look mighty better than when you came in. But there’s not many around right now. And the others would like to see you. Especially Beau. She’s been worried sick.”

“I… I don’t feel really comfortable having her around. I don’t want her pity.”

“Molly, don’t be an asshole now. She’s feeling guilty for what happened to you, and that she couldn’t save you from it.”

“None of that was her fault”, Molly mumbled.

“I know that. I think she knows that too, but it would be good of you to tell her that. You know, I never knew that woman could cry.” Molly nodded slowly. 

“Ok, I’ll talk to her…”

“Good. I’ll go get her and see to that they’ll get a bath ready for you.”

 

Beau was down in the common room, already with a beer in her hand, which was doing nothing to raise her spirits. She had hardly slept, and rose early, leaving Yasha curled up in a ball. Beer had seemed a good way to start the day. It was almost bread anyway. She looked up at Fjord who just came downstairs. He raised an eyebrow at her.

“Breakfast beer? Anyway, I convinced Mollymauk to allow you to see him. You’d better go up at once before he changes his mind.” Beau just nodded. Fjord added in a soft voice: “He’s not doing so well, physically or mentally. Go easy on him. I’ll be up in just a moment.” He went to the bar to get the innkeeper’s attention. Beau emptied her cup and sneaked upstairs. She didn’t wait for an answer when she’d knocked on the door and entered the room. Molly was propped up on pillows and was leaning his head against the headboard. Even though he looked better than when she last had seen him, a pang of guilt went through her. His purple skin was pale, almost greyish and a sheen of sweat covered his brow. His eyes were closed and his breath rapid and shallow. Beau closed the door quietly and approached the bed. She didn’t touch him, but sat down on the edge of the mattress.

“Hi”, she said softly. “It’s good to see you. Are you better?”

“Not hurting as much at least… But I’ve been better…” Molly didn’t open his eyes.

“I’m so sorry!” Beau blurted out. “It’s all my fault! You shouldn’t have taken that whip for me! Why would you do that? You don’t even like me!” A clammy hand grabbed hers, and Molly opened his eyes to look at her.

“None of this is your fault. It’s that bastard’s fault, no one else’s. And no, I maybe didn’t  _ have _ to take that hit for you, but I did. Because you’re wrong, I  _ do _ like you. Even though you are a bit obnoxious.” She squeezed his hand. She couldn’t come up with anything more to say, and Molly stayed silent, so she sat there with his hand in hers, until Fjord returned to the room and proclaimed that a bath was ready for them in the shed in the backyard.

“I really don’t want to go down…” Molly groaned. Fjord snorted.

“I could carry you, if you prefer.” Molly just growled at the half-orc and swung his long legs over the side of the bed so he was sitting beside Beauregard. That small movement seemed to drain him, and he hung his head and pulled the blankets around him. It took Beau a moment to react when he began to fall forward.

“Woah there!” She grabbed his shoulders and pulled him back. He looked up at her under half closed eyelids, and his face was even grayer than before. 

“I think you fainted there, for a bit”, Fjord said, badly concealing the worry in his voice. “Maybe we should wait with the bath after all.” Molly shook his head.

“No. I’ll be fine. Let’s not waste it. I might need some support down the stairs, though. And my coat.” Fjord nodded and grabbed Molly’s coat which was folded neatly at the footlocker and held it out for him. Molly rose slowly, steadying himself on Beau, and let the blanket fall. Beau caught a glimpse of his naked body before he wrapped himself in his colourful coat. He looked physically good, most of the wounds on his back had disappeared, but his posture was hunched and reeked of defeat. He swayed where he stood and Fjord put an arm around his waist to steady him. 

“I’ve got this, Beau”, the half-orc said and lead a trembling, barefoot Mollymauk out of the room and down the stairs, Beau picking up the rear. She left them by the common room, where they caught a few glances, and sat down by Caleb and Nott by the fire.

 

The bathing shed was small, but warm. A small stove with a crackling fire burned in the corner, and a tub filled with steaming water stood in the middle. Molly slipped out of his coat, and, with a little coaching from Fjord, got into the tub. A sigh of relief escaped his lips. “See”, Fjord smiled. “Not so bad, was it? I’ll just sit in the corner and wait while you have a good soak, ok.” Mollymauk nodded and sank back into the water.

 

Fjord had nodded off on the small stool he was sitting on, but woke up to the restrained sobs emanating from the tub. He bolted upright and took the two strides to be on Mollymauk’s side. He was sitting in the water, arms around his legs, rocking back and forth and banging his face to his knees. Fjord slipped a hand around Molly’s head and the other around his shoulders and pulled him to his chest. “Hey, stop that”, he soothed. “It won’t do any good.” The man in his arms was shaking so much that water spilled on the floor.

“I’m so frightened”, he whispered between sobs. “I’m so frightened it hurts.”

“I know. But nothing will harm you here. I promise. Come, lean back and let me wash your hair.” After a bit of coaching Molly relented and leaned his head back into Fjord’s hands, who guided him down slowly in the water. Holding Molly’s head with one hand and a bar of soap in the other, he started to wash the dark purple strands. Brown clouds spread in the water as the blood and the grime washed out. Fjord let his fingers massage Molly’s scalp, and watched his friend relax. He was quite beautiful, he realized, when the tense grimace washed off of his face. Fjord lathered up his hands and let them run over Molly’s scarred skin at his neck and shoulders.

“Is this good?”, he asked, quietly. Molly hummed. Fjord gently washed Molly’s neck and face, giving his cheekbones a massaging rub and continued up to the base of his horns. His skin was still hot, and his eyes half closed.

“You should wash yourself properly so we can get you back to bed”, Fjord proposed. “You can’t sleep here.” Molly sighed and grabbed the washcloth handed to him. He weakly started to scrub himself over the rest of his body. After a while Fjord realized he rubbed the same spot on his chest, over and over again. The skin was starting to turn red and Fjord grabbed his hand.

“I think you’re done now.” He put Mollys arm around his shoulders and helped him out of the tub and wrapped him in a towel. He went to get Molly’s cloak and turned to look at the lavender tiefling. He looked miserable, with hunched shoulders and shaky legs, the wet hair clinging to his face. He made no move to dress. He made no move at all. He stared off in the distance and then his legs gave way and he fell into a crumpled heap on the floor. Fjord swore loudly and was by him in a stride. He pulled Molly’s head into his lap and patted his cheek gently.

“Molly... Mollymauk!” Molly half opened his eyes. Fjord sighed in relief. “Hey, there you are. Don’t go scaring me like that, it’s rude. Do you think you can stand?” Molly made a weak effort to rise, but fell back on the floor.

“I… I’m sorry… I don’t think I can…” Tears began to fill his eyes again. “I’m so sorry…” Fjord gave his forehead a brief kiss.

“Don’t worry. I’ll carry you up.” He covered Molly in the colourful coat and hoisted him up in his arms with a grunt. With some effort and help from Yasha, who came running when she spotted them from the common room, he managed to get Molly up to the room and in bed. Molly was barely awake and moaned quietly. Fjord sighed.

“Will you watch over him for a bit, Yasha? I could use some proper sleep. I sure hope he’s better tomorrow.”


	4. Chapter 4

Mollymauk wasn’t better by the morrow. If anything he was worse. The little he managed to eat came up again, and he drank very little. He slept most of the day, moaning deliriously, or wept silently grasping the hand of either Fjord or Yasha who took turns watching over him. On the next day they decided to take him to the infirmary. Yasha was carrying him, wrapped in blankets as Fjord lead the way to the looming brick building, flanked by Beau. Jester, Caleb and Nott had stayed behind at the inn. They were let inside by a surly dragonborn who showed them to a cell where they could place Molly on a narrow bed. His face was almost gray and his breath was rapid and shallow, but he was very still. They waited for a while until the cleric came around. He glanced at Mollymauk. No concern was showing in his eyes as he spoke coldly: 

“Well, how can I help you?” Fjord frowned.

“My friend is sick.”

“I can see that. A fever usually passes by itself.” The cleric was on the way out of the door, but Yasha barred the way.  

“You will help him”, she said flatly.

“He was hurt”, Fjord explained. “He was healed, but he’s still sick.” The cleric sighed.

“Well, I suppose a wound festered before it was healed. I can sort that out for 200 gold if we find the wound.” Fjord just nodded. Beau stomped impatiently with her foot.

“Well, get on with it then!” The cleric snarled at her and unceremoniously removed the blankets from Molly. He raised an eyebrow at his many scars but quickly scanned the unconscious tiefling’s naked body.

“I can see nothing wrong”, he snorted and again began to leave the room, but Yasha still blocked the door..

“He was raped”, Beau said quietly. “Violently. Maybe… maybe there’s something inside…”

“Why didn’t you just say that? Would you mind turning him over?”

“Why?” Fjord asked suspisciously.

“Why?” The cleric gave a short laugh. “I have to feel it of course. How else could I know what’s wrong?” Beau growled. Had she had prominent incisors they had been very obvious. Fjord frowned.

“So you’re…”

“... going to put a finger or two inside his rectum, yes. Believe me, I take no pleasure in it either, so let’s get on with it.” He crossed his arms, waiting. Fjord resented and gently cupped Molly’s face in his large hands.

“Molly? Molly, do you hear me?” Mollymauk opened his eyes and made a tired sound. “Good. So, we’re at the infirmary, because you are very, very sick. Now, the cleric thinks that there’s something wrong… inside you. And I’m so sorry, but he has to go in to fix you.” It took a few seconds before realization struck Molly’s face, and his eyes widened in fear.

“No! Nonononono!” He tried to roll off the narrow bed, but was so weak he barely got up on his side. Beau rushed to his side, tears in her eyes and grabbed his hands.

“It’s going to be fine! This doctor might be an asshole, but I think he knows what he’s doing.” The cleric snorted from the other side of the bed. “I’ll hold your hands the whole time, and if he tries something I’ll strangle him slowly, ok?” Molly grasped at her hands, hard.

“Please, don’t make me…” The pleading words almost broke Beau’s heart and she kissed his cheek in a rare display of affection. 

“You’ll be ok. It will be over quick, and we’ll be right here with you. We need you to get well.” Molly closed his eyes and gave a small nod. Fjord put a reassuring hand on his head and began to stroke his hair. The cleric grabbed a jar of thick jelly and lubricated a couple of fingers. Yasha intently stared at the small window in the room while the vile cleric spread Molly’s buttocks, inserted a digit and started feeling around, humming. Molly screwed his face, opening his mouth in a scream that didn’t leave his vocal cords. His hands gripped so hard around Beaus that Fjord thought they would break, but she was so focused on Molly’s face she didn’t seen to notice. Fjord himself had his eyes on the cleric. He despised the man who now had two fingers deep inside his friend, turning them around. Mollymauk let out a howl of pain.

“Ah, there it is!” the cleric exclaimed. He put his other hand on the low of Molly’s back and concentrated. A warm light emanated from his fingers. And then he pulled out and wiped his fingers on his robes. “All done. He should be fine in a day or two. That’s 200 gold, thank you.” Fjord winced at the price, but scooped up the gold while Beau quickly covered Molly up in the blanket. He was breathing easier now, but seemed to have passed out from exhaustion.

“Let’s go”, Yasha mumbled and picked up Molly, cradling him in her arms. 

 

They hardly spoke on the way back to the inn. Molly slept quietly, only his bare feet and head poking out from the blanket. The inn was quiet when they came back, but the rest of the Nein was by the fireplace in the common room and bolted up when they entered. They gathered round Yasha who plowed through them and went straight to put Mollymauk to bed.

“How did it go?” Caleb asked quietly.

“He’s going to be fine”, Beau muttered and went to sit in an armchair by the fire.

“That’s good, isn’t it”, Nott said and climbed the same chair to sit on the armrest. “Why are you grumpy then? You should be happy.”

“Cleric was a shit.” Beau stared into the fire with a calculating fury on her face. Jester sat on the floor in front of her.

“That’s not good”, she said, twirling a donut on her finger. “I should go talk to them. Clerics should be nice and kind when they treat the sick. Like I am!” Beau sighed and stroked Jester’s blue hair.

“Yes… If more people were like you I’m sure the world would be a better, albeit more chaotic and sticky, place…” She curled up on the armchair, a shiver running through her body. Jester turned around to look at her.

“Beau, are you crying?”

“No, I’m not crying”, Beau answered through restrained sobs. Caleb, who had been sitting closer to the fire looked up. A few moments later an orange ball of fur was in her lap, purring. She petted Frumpkin while breathing deeply to calm down. Meanwhile, Fjord had gotten them a couple of drinks and he put one in Beau’s hand. She thanked him and drank deep.

“I’m going to see to Molly”, Jester announced. Nott sprang down from the chair.

“Me too! Caleb?”

“I think it will be a little too crowded. I’ll stay here and read a bit.” Caleb pulled out a book and was soon in another world. Fjord looked at Beau.

“May I talk to you for a moment?” She nodded and he sat down on the floor in front of her. He stayed quiet for a while, so long that Beau actually poked him before he spoke.

“It was hard. Seeing his face during… the treatment. It must have been horrible for you, back in the cell…” Beau closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“It was… More than I care to remember. This time at least I could try to support him… I feel like shit, though. It feels like since I coaxed him to accept the treatment, I allowed him to be violated yet again.” She took a few more deep breaths. Fjord leaned his cheek on her knee and patted her leg with his large hand.

“Hey… That doctor was a prick, but I think he sorted it out after all. Molly might have died if we hadn’t went there.”

“Yeah, I know. Still feels like shit.”

“Sure does.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contains suicide attempt.

Mollymauk’s fever went down during the following day. He was still weak, but managed to eat a little under Yasha’s supervision. He was very quiet and said very little to any of them. Beau went to say hi a couple of times, but he barely opened his eyes. After two more days he was strong enough to get out of bed. Yasha had to coax him to get up and dress, and go downstairs. The rest of the Nein was happy to see him, and swarmed around him. Nott hugged his leg and wouldn’t let go. Molly just stood there, looking gaunt, his colourful coat accenting his pale appearance. Jester pulled him into an enthusiastic embrace, while Caleb gave him a nod and a small smile from a distance. Fjord urged him to sit down in one of the armchairs, and he did, silently. He listened to the other’s discussion on what they should do next, but didn’t participate. He ate and drank what was put in front of him, but without enthusiasm. At long last he said he’d go to bed, and left unsteadily. Yasha caught Fjord’s eyes and jerked her head in Molly’s direction. Fjord got the hint and went to check on him. When he came to the room, Molly laid on the bed curled up in a ball, fully dressed, staring into the rough wall.

“Hey, Molly…” No answer. Fjord approached the bed and sat on the edge. “May I touch you?” A shrug. “I’m going to lie down beside you and hold you for a bit, ok? I think you need it.” He snuggled up behind Molly and pulled him close. Molly tensed up for a moment, but relaxed as Fjord grabbed his hand.

“How are you holding up?”

“I’m fine…” Molly mumbled.

“Don’t bullshit me”, Fjord sighed. “You don’t have to talk, but I think it would do you good. I worry.”

“Don’t. I’ll be fine.” Contradicting what he just said, Molly’s body cramped up in a spasmic fit of sobs. He put his hand to his mouth and bit it hard, supressing a moan. Fjord pulled him closer and rocked him gently, shushing. He pulled Molly’s hand away from his mouth - it was bleeding where the tieflings sharp canines had pierced the skin.

“We’ll look after you, I promise. You are among friends. Weird friends, I admit, but friends all the same. We’ll have your back, through all the shit you’re wading through right now. Now rest for a bit. I’ll be right here.”

 

Over the next few weeks Mollymauk seemed to get a bit better. He was rather silent, but occasionally joined the group’s bantering conversation, even cracking a joke from time to time. Fjord thought he was turning in on himself too much, and tried to pry once, but Molly had angrily lashed out and told him to leave him alone, so he did. One afternoon they, except Yasha who had left for a spell, sat by the fireside at the inn they currently stayed at. They’d had a long day and everyone was tired. Mollymauk seemed particularly out of it. He cradled his drink and stared into the fire. Suddenly he rose.

“I’m going to take a bath. Please leave me alone.” And he left. Beau glanced at Fjord, who shrugged. The bantering continued on, Caleb read, Jester and Fjord played a set of cards. It was getting pretty late when Fjord realised Molly hadn’t made it back yet. He would have passed them on the way back to the room. A twang of worry he couldn’t shake twisted his innards. He rose from the chair.

“I’m going to check on Molly.”

“But he said he wanted to be left alone”, Nott protested. Fjord ignored her and went to the bathing shed. He knocked on the door. No answer. He pulled at the door handle and it was locked. Dread was beginning to set in - he took a deep breath, put his shoulder to the door and forced it open.

At first he thought Molly had fallen asleep in the bath, but then he saw the bloody scimitar on the floor and the red water in the tub. Fjord rushed up to the pale tiefling. _Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!_

“Fuck!” He felt Molly’s pulse. It was there, faintly. “ _Help!_ ” he roared. “ _Jester!_ ” She couldn’t hear of course. He pulled Molly’s lifeless, naked body out of the water, blood still flowing from deep gashes along his wrists. He quickly hoisted him up in his arms, rushing inside. The panic and despair raked his chest like barbed wire.

“ _Jester_!” he roared as soon as he came through the door. “Quickly!” The blood from Molly’s arms pooled at Fjords chest. “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!” Jester came running, a confused look on her face. When she saw the state of Mollymauk she went pale and rigid.

“What?” she whispered. “Why? Why would he do such a thing?” Fjord closed up the distance between them, almost pushing Molly’s body in her face.

“Doesn’t matter now, just fix him before it’s too late.” Jester grabbed Molly’s wrists, and the warm light spread from her fingers, closing the wounds. Her fingers lingered, checking his pulse. Molly took a deep breath but didn’t open his eyes. Jester sighed with relief, a tear wetting her cheek.

“He’ll be fine now.” She patted Fjord on the shoulder. “You should take him upstairs. He’s naked and people are staring.” Fjord realised just then that they were standing just by the common room, which had gone quiet with all the patrons staring at them. Caleb approached, removing his coat to cover Molly up.

“He was in the tub, yes?” he asked and Fjord nodded. “I’ll take care of it. Just look after him, ok? Jester, would you tell Beau and Nott what happened?” At Jester’s response he left to talk to, and possibly bribe, the innkeeper and Fjord climbed the staircase, with Molly in his arms. Again. As he put him down on the bed Molly stirred and lifted a hand to Fjord’s cheek.

“...empty…” Fjord took Molly’s hand and realised his face was wet. He sat down with his back against the headrest and pulled Molly into his lap and hugged him hard, letting his tears fall freely.

“Why did you do that?” he sobbed. “Why, by the gods, did you do that, you fucking idiot?”

“...empty…”

“Stop that”, Fjord cried. “You’re not empty! You’re one of the fullest and richest people I’ve ever met. You fucking bastard, I’m so angry with you right now!” He was sobbing now, cradling Molly’s head against his chest. “Fuck you, Molly! Fuck you!” He didn’t know how long he had sat there when Yasha stormed in, followed by Beauregard. Molly looked up at the commotion, and then lowered his head again.

“...empty…”

“No…” Yasha moaned. “Not again… Don’t go to that place again, Mollymauk, I need you here.” She grabbed Molly’s shoulders and shook him slightly. She palmed his face and turned him to look at her. He gave her an apologetic glance and looked away. She kissed his forehead, and sighed..

“It’s ok, my dear… Take your time… I’m glad you’re alive.” She turned to Fjord. “How are you doing?” Fjord was taken aback by the question.

“Me? I’m not the one slicing my wrists open.” Molly winced slightly. Yasha gave him half a smile.

“No, but you’ve had quite a shock. I’ll go get something for you, just keep an eye on Mollymauk.” Yasha turned abruptly and left. Beau looked after her, confused.

“Yeah, glad you’re alive, Molly”, she said, and hurried after Yasha.

 

When Beau exited the door she saw Yasha, leaning against the wall, breathing heavily. She hesitated, but went up to her to pat her arm. “You ok?” Yasha shook her head.

“Last time he was like this it tooks months for him to speak again… It was horrible. And now… He tried to kill himself. Thank the gods Fjord went to check on him. We couldn’t afford a resurrection. I’m so angry I don’t know what to do. I want to punch him, for trying to leave me alone!” It was the most Beau had heard Yasha say in one go.

“You would not be completely alone”, she said, leaning her cheek on Yashas shoulder. “I’d be here.” Yasha wrapped her in her large arms.

“Yes, you would. Because I wouldn’t let you be anywhere else. Let’s go get Fjord a drink. I think he finally might have realised what he feels for Mollymauk.”

Beau stared at her. “Whu?”

Yasha gave a short laugh. “He’s had a thing for Molly for ages, couldn’t you see?”

 

Fjord spent the most of the following days looking after Molly. Physically, he was fine. He had ceased saying empty a day in, and was merely quiet. He would do anything Fjord asked of him, but otherwise he lay on the bed, unmoving. Whenever he slept he would moan and weep and Fjord would hold him until he calmed down. Yasha was there often, but Fjord could see the strain it took on her to try to stay positive watching her closest friend in this state. Beau was there sometimes, just to hold Molly’s hand for a little while, she didn’t know what else to do. The rest came to say hi once in a while.

One night, when Beau just had left, Fjord was mending a pair of socks when he heard whimpering from Molly. He went to check on him, and his heart broke as always when he saw his friend like this. He was curled up in a ball, crying, clawing at his face, throat and chest, leaving bleeding marks. Fjord took a steady grip around his wrists.

“Hey now, stop that!” Molly struggled against him, but couldn’t match his strength, and instead flopped against him, all fight running out of him. Fjord sat on the bed and pulled him to his chest…

“Fuck, Mollymauk… You’re scaring me. Please don’t hurt yourself again, _please_! You’re breaking my heart. I love you, dammit!” At those words Molly looked up at him.

“You… love me?”    

 

 


End file.
